Austin 4wN 2018
🔥 4 Weeks: 4 Lays 🔥 4WN Austin ------ tldr; read the entire post you lazy cunt. ------ Coming into this program, I had gone through almost every major RSD course in my 2 years of being in game and felt like I had already learned most of what was needed to be successful. A lot of you reading this may be in the situation I was, asking myself If I really needed ANOTHER program to help me. After observing this group for months, I really resonated with Ryan’s style and approach to game and decided to take the leap.
It was one of the greatest decisions I’ve ever made.
For me, this program was more about putting all the pieces of the puzzle together as opposed to learning more tactics/techniques. With that being said, I had quite a few key major breakthroughs during the program that I've outlined below: - 🔑 Shift 1: PERMISSION & SELF BELIEF… - Week 1, we were pre-briefing for the night out at a restaurant/bar and I excused myself to use the restroom. As I headed to the other side of the venue, I passed by a 4 set of gorgeous women having dinner and one made strong eye contact with me. After leaving the restroom, headed back to join the crew, once again - this same girl made eye contact with me.
I went up to Ryan and explained the situation just to find out what he would do. He explained how he would politely go up the table and handle the situation and told me I should go do it. I instantly started making excuses like not wanting to bother them, they must have boyfriends, it would be rude to interrupt them, etc. All of the thoughts that come from not feeling like you are enough. Frankly, I was being a complete bitch because these girls were stunning - I had never approached such an attractive set before by myself.
Well, being the master coach he is, Ryan wasn’t going to let me off the hook. He reiterated multiple times that I should go talk to them and said something simple and profound that day that has stuck with me - “When in doubt, go find out”.
I went up to their table and stated something a long the lines of “Sorry to interrupt your conversation, but I had to come meet you”, introduced myself to the whole group, started telling my story and what I was up to in town and that night. Once the entire group warmed up to me I grabbed a seat next to the girl who I had made eye contact with earlier by stating “I’m gonna join you for a few minutes, I hope you don’t mind”. I wasn’t asking for permission, just taking the action and being polite about it. I had a great 10 minute chat with the girl and her friends, got their Instagrams and left to join the crew at the next bar.
I had mentioned to the girls what venue we were going to, and long behold - they showed up later in the night, reproached me, and hung out for the remainder of the night. Logistics were bad so nothing went down afterwards, but going through that whole experience set a strong tone for the rest of the program, and created an experience that I can reference over and over again.
Ryan gave me the PERMISSION to open that set, and by taking action, I gained the SELF BELIEF that I was capable of doing so.
Throughout the program, I would continue to open more and more large sets by myself and now have no problem opening any set in any situation. I had received the permission to do it from Ryan during Week 1, and now had the self belief engrained in me that I could. - 🔑 Shift 2: REFINEMENT & POLISH... - The second shift came from small refinements and tweaks to my game. These included things like using more Statements of Motivation, Statements of Empathy, and one of the most important things, excusing every set early on in the interaction. This meant essentially telling the girl(s) that they could go, that I didn’t want to stop them from whatever they were up to.
By explicitly stating “Don’t let me stop you from having your girls night out” or “If you need to get going/join your friends, don’t let me stop you”, 95% of girls would reply “No, it’s okay”, essentially prompting me to stay in set and keep talking to them. Just expressing to girls that I wasn't trying to control them or have my own agenda in turn lead them to explicitly stating that they wanted me to stay.
This was incredibly powerful for my sets and development throughout the program and Ryan made sure I was doing it all of the time.
Another benefit of having a coach around for a month is the small tweaks and custom feedback you get along the way to improve your unique style of game. Some of the smaller tweaks for me were to: - Keep my head up, always looking around (I had a tendency to look at the ground when walking) - Pause more in conversation and give the girl room to invest - Speak a bit more slowly - Make less eye contact, take the pressure off and look around instead
These set of minor changes ended up leading to significantly improved interactions and end results. - 🔑 Shift 3: ABUNDANCE... - From the start of the program I had this “must get results” mentality. I was doing day game and night game every day with dating apps mixed in to get plenty of leads. I was in an urgency to get girls out on dates as quickly as possible, and would often pack my weeks back to back with dates, trying to close as much as possible. I would also go out every night and feel the need to open every set I came across. I was hindering my progress by trying to get the end result as quickly as possible.
It wasn’t until one night with Alex that I was able to fix this. “Jet, you can ONLY approach 5 sets the ENTIRE night" Alex stated. “And by the way, you have to tell me which set you’re going to open, and we have to analyze it before you go in”. My immediate response was wtf, but I suppose there was a lesson here.
As the night proceeded, knowing that I couldn’t just open any set forced me to be more grounded, to slow down, the opposite of what I was used to. Instead of approaching every set, Alex and I would deliberately discuss the set, what they were feeling, what sort of night they might be having, etc.
This taught me to have a little more thought behind my approaches, and really hone in and focus more on the girls that I was really into versus feeling the need to open every set.
In turn, over the course of the entire month I really learned how to slow down and let go of my desire to want the approach to work, to have the date as quick as possible, to close as soon as possible - and just take a breath and let things unfold.
This shift allowed me to reach true abundance. By the end of the program, I became detached from outcomes, gained complete self acceptance, and was rewarded by my phone constantly blowing up with girls chasing me.
4 weeks and 4 quality lays later, I was a changed man.
For anyone on the fence about doing a 4WN, I couldn’t recommend it more.
A huge shoutout to Arthur for introducing me to this community, and to my 4WN Austin boys Andrew Bartek Ian Jacob Jose Pranav... there’s something incredibly beautiful about spending a month with like minded men, watching each other grow along the way 🙏